Contemporary Retirement Coaching Blog

What would you like to become excellent at?

It takes 10,000 hours of practice to achieve excellence.  Retirement 'frees up' between 2,000 and 3,000 hours per year.  What would you like to become excellent at?

Emotional Currency - Where are you spending it? by Scott Stratten

I came across the following little video clip (it's a taster of a coaching program offered by Scott Stratten) which might give you food for thought about where you're spending your emotional energy:

The Fun Theory

A supportive website for widows

I found a useful-looking website for widows this morning - www.widowspath.com.  It has helpful weblinks, a blog, articles and, if you join (it's free), you get a free ebook entitled: Grief Loss Guide for Widows.  An audio version of the book is also available.

Are you happy?

Thanks to Scott Stratten for the link to the following flowchart by Headup at Typcut.com:

In remembrance

On 11 September 2001, I happened to be at home for the day (here in the UK) as I was taking a couple of days of my annual holiday from my job as a curriculum manager in a community college.  As the UK is 5 hours ahead of New York, it was early afternoon and I was half-watching a film on TV when a newsflash announced the breaking news that something had happened to one of the Twin Towers.  At that stage, it wasn't even clear that a plane had crashed into the building. 

As it became apparent that something of immense importance was taking place, all scheduled television programmes were abandoned and I watched with horrified fascination and incredulity as the terrible events of that day continued to unfold, until I fell asleep in the early hours of the next morning.  My thoughts today are with the people who died 8 years ago and their families.

I was interested to see that the anniversary has been designated a day of national service and, although some Americans fear that this could overshadow and diminish a sombre day of remembrance, I can't help but feel that if I were one of the people killed on 9/11, I would be happy to know that something good had come out of those terrible events.

Build Your Own Laboratory by Barbara Winter

I've signed up for many email newsletters over the years, many of which I never seem to find time to read, but one that I wouldn't dream of ignoring is that of Barbara Winter, author of Making a Living Without a Job and writer of the Buon Viaggio blog.  Barbara's newsletter arrived in my inbox this morning and I loved the following article so much, I just had to share it with you...

Long after my formal schooling had ended, I first encountered the term "personal growth." Up until then, I had assumed that once I reached adulthood, I had finished growing and that was that. I was immediately fascinated by the implications that growth could continue. Those two little words carried hope. The end of dead ends. Stretching. Discovery. Becoming. Wider horizons. Beginnings. I became a passionate student.

As time went on, the notion of lifelong growth took root in my mind until I simply assumed it was something that would be a daily part of my life. However, I spent hours in seminars, with my nose in books, journaling all in pursuit of growth. The best of these experiences pointed me in the right direction, but the real work was done in my real life.

You can create your own growth laboratory and design a formal curriculum that will stretch you in new directions. Wherever you are in your own journey, there's always another place to explore. Here are some basics for building such a laboratory.

Be ferocious about planting yourself in fertile environments. Identifying what you want to do is only a tiny first step. You must then place yourself in situations that support your success. That means finding others who can nurture and teach you. As Sir Ken Robinson points out, "Connecting with people who share the same passions affirms that you're not alone." They can also help broaden your perspective. Don't plant yourself or your dreams in a desert and expect to see growth.

Find a way to do something you've always wanted to do, but haven't. All those exercises that urge you to imagine your own funeral really are meant to put you in touch with the things you've been neglecting. This is a difficult exercise for people who have buried their dreams far in advance of their funeral.

Make a list of old and new adventures not yet taken. Pick one and commit to making it happen. Then do it again. Nothing is better exercise for your imagination-and confidence-than making this a regular activity.

Build an Option Bank. An Option Bank, just like the place where you store money, is a repository of good ideas, dreams and goals. Like an ordinary bank, the more you put in, the more you can draw out. The best way to get started at this is by realizing that there is never just a single option available to you. On the other hand, if you are stuck and believe that your only way out is closed for repairs, your life will begin to shrink, not expand.

Be an instigator. "Parties who want milk," said Elbert Hubbard, "should not seat themselves on a stool in the middle of a field in hopes the cow will back up to them." Personal growth is about taking personal responsibility. Waiting for things to happen won't cut it. Stirring things up in your own laboratory will.

Are you tiptoeing through life?

As part of my own personal and professional development, I'm currently in a year-long programme with coach David Neagle.  The weekly group calls are held on Wednesday evenings, US time and, because I'm in the UK and an early-riser, I can never stay up late enough to listen to them, so I tend to listen to the call recordings on Thursday mornings instead.  About three-quarters of the way through this week's call, I heard David say something that stopped me in my tracks.  He said:

'We tiptoe through life, hoping to make it safely through to death.'

I immediately pressed the 'pause' button to think about that and further research revealed that this is, originally, an Earl Nightingale quote:

"Most people tiptoe through life hoping to make it safely to death."

Wow!  That's really got me thinking... (Especially in a week that includes two family funerals and the realization that I only have one aunt and one uncle left now!)  Am I doing that?  Am I tiptoeing though life, hoping to make it safely through to death? 

Are you doing it?

How are you doing it? 

How risk-averse are you?

How has this held you back in the past?

What would you have liked to have done that you ultimately considered to be 'too risky'?

Is this something that you could 'revisit' now?

What really matters to you that you're currently not doing anything about?

Where could you make a start?  What's the first step?  And the next?

(Personally, instead of tiptoeing, I think I'd prefer to dance!  How about you?)

Thought provokers: Regrets

If you got hit by a bus tomorrow, what would you regret not doing?  What would you regret not saying?  Where would you regret not travelling to?

What's the first step? 

Thought Provokers: About voluntary work

'Investing time in a community organization or a charity because you are a helpful and kind person is not the same as doing it because you feel passionately about contributing to a greater good or making the world more beautiful or friendly.'

Karen Gail Lewis

Do you agree with the above statement?

What kinds of voluntary work have you done/considered because you are a helpful and kind person?

What kinds of voluntary work do/would you feel passionately about?